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Thread: Complaints department

  1. #1
    Fever Hunter bearngg00se's Avatar
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    Default Complaints department

    ahhhh...the British/English language - there is nothing sweeter!


    These are genuine clips from council (subsidized housing in the U.K.) complaint letters:


    * My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.

    * He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

    * It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

    * I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

    * I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

    * And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

    * I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.

    * My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

    * I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

    * Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

    * I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen

    * 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.

    * I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

    * The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

    * Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

    * Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

    * I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.

    * The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

    * Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.

    * I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

    * Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

    * I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

    * This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2</SPAN>
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    I'm not a complete idiot
    - some parts are missing
    *Thunder VII**Azteca Legends**NeoPlanetT

  2. The following 5 users say "Thanks" to bearngg00se


  3. #2
    You're Welcome! azlew's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department

    GREAT STUFF !! THANKS!!

  4. #3
    Goodwill Ambassador luckydog's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department

    This is actual feedback I got for a sale on Ebay

    "Came rather quickly and my daughter was pleased"
    幸運わんわん Luckydog or Yukiwanwan in Japanese

  5. #4
    Have no fear...... H20Dreams's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department

    . .. .. ..
    There's no need to fear....
    Pachislo: Speed Racer, King Camel, Beast Sapp, Sindbad Adventure, Death Valley.Pachinko: Popeye, Fever Kagetu, Fever Circus, Spiderman Neo American: Red,White,& Blue Deluxe

  6. #5
    Pachi Puro Lazarus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department

    Doesn't sound good no matter how it could be! Yes it is a good thing to proof read how something sounds before making that last click of the mouse.

  7. #6
    Scowlin' Jean Hornigold hanabi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department



    Angie ...
    Pachinkos, Pachislos, Coffee, Papercraft Ninja, Pinball

    I ran away with the Steampunk Circus!
    I was hiding in a room in my mind...
    You crush the lily in my soul...



  8. #7
    Sandwich Shooter Bartsimpson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complaints department

    That Is Good.
    "I'm Bart Simpson Who The Hell Are You?"
    OMG! You're Japanese? I thought you were oriental!
    slotmachinesforum - Bartsimpson

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