You know you're an IOWAN when:
During a storm you check the cattle before you check the kids.
You're related to more than half the town.
You can tell the difference between a horse and a cow from a distance.
Your car breaks down outside of town and news of it reaches back to town before you do.
You don't put too much effort into hairstyles due to wind and weather.
Your quarterback is hurt and you're hoping it's the first thing on the 6 o'clock news.
There's a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for it.
The local gas station sells live bait.
You don't buy all your vegetables at the grocery store.
You go to the State fair for your family vacation.
You get up at 5:30 am and go down to the coffee shop.
You're on a first name basis with the county sheriff.
When little smokies are something you serve on special occasions.
You go to the river because it's almost like going to the ocean.
You try to find the cheapest room rates when going out of town.
Using the elevator involved a corn truck.
Your mayor is also your garbage hauler, barber, and insurance salesman. ( or maybe the Priest)
You know you should listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
You walk knee-deep in snow.
You call the wrong number and talk to the person for an hour anyway.
Your excuse for getting out of school is that the cows got out.
You talk with a friend about some big event you're going to attend, and by the end of the conversation you've decided you're both too broke to go.
You know cow pies aren't made of beef.
Your early morning prayer covers rain, cattle, and hogs.
You consider a romantic evening driving through Hardees and renting a hunting instructional video.
You listen to "Paul Harvey" every day at noon.
You can tell it's a farmer working late in his field and not a UFO.
Your nearest neighbor is in the next area code.
You leave your snow tires on year-round.
You know the difference between field corn and sweet corn when they are still on the stalk.
You know the code names for everyone on the CB.
You pick up all the free stuff at the State Fair.
You'll skip your cousin's funeral for the first day of deer season. (Or maybe even your best friends wedding)
You can eat an ear of corn with no utensils in under 20 seconds.
You don't clean up the dog's mess because it's just fertilizer.
You know enough to get your driving done early on Sundays before the Sunday drivers come out.
It takes 30 seconds to reach your destination and it's clear across town.
You can tell the smell of a skunk and the smell of a feed lot apart.
The meaning of true love is that you'll ride in the tractor with him.
You consider a building a mall if it's bigger than the local Wal-Mart.
Your husband drives a friend home from the bar when he only lives 3 houses away.
And may all the Iowans live happily ever after in their field of dreams...
Ain't Iowa Great, Life is more enjoyable here.
"This is My Personal Opinion and no others"
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Originally Posted by arbycoffee
