The day started bad and seemed to get worse!

[Just PAchinkos]

I woke up this mornin all excited to be displaying my pachinkos, jumped out of bed and got ready. Covering of snow but that won't stop me I thought.
I pulled out my trailer which was stacked full. And had a flat tyre! Doh, its the first time I have changed a wheel on this and at about 3 tonnes it was a pig to change, my jack wasn't up to it and I spent ages messing about with it.
Then I think no I will still go and show my wares.
I get there 2 hours late and have never displayed at this venue before. I think I must have visited a funeral by mistake, talk about miserable folk. It was a toy fair and I have an image in my mind of kindly old folk with a grandfatherly niceness being the type to run toy stalls.

Couldn't be further from the truth, I said to my neighbour stall holder cherfully '"I'll apologise now for my machines music it might be a bit repeatative!", She sucked a lemon and started muttering something, I thought,Oh joy!

Then the event drew a crowd of nill, I was told we had 300 through the door, yeah right only saw about 100 all day max.

So now I start packing up and the old lemon sucker from earlier came over to me with a pachinko ball, "This was under my stall!", "Oh thanks I would have wondered where it was later", I said (I know all my balls by name! All 200 000 of my precious friends). I thought humour was the best plan to defrost her.
No she bounced back with, " I stood on it and could have had a nasty accident"

I turned away because I am a polite person and I could feel myself being drawn into a rude response.

10 minutes later she was back........" After my near nasty accident I just wondered if you have public liability insurance?"

Yes £2million.

"Oh right, it was very dangerous."
To which I replied, I have walked on more pachinko balls than I can remember and have never come close to slipping, then I let go my reserve and said to her,
" It would take a special kind of complete idiot to be able to fall over on just one ball, how close did you come?"
She walked away sucking her lemon.

All this aside I didn't make any sales and got frozen, now sitting here I just know I am coming down with a man cold....and my wife doesn't understand ! I WANT SYMPATHY!!!!!!

To be fair I did meet some nice people and had a chance to tell them about pachinko, but it was the stall holders I felt were miserable even my son picked up on what they were like.

[arbycoffee]

There must have been a sour pikle stall as they came in and all were forced to suck one. What I do in the position you were in, is I look at everyone around me as naked, than it becomw funny to talk to anyone when they be naked.

I have told people with their faces so screwed up that, " See your mom told you if you make that face to much it was going to stay".

I am so sorry your first outting was a pizzy mess, just think your next one has to be better than that. Also next time take a Whooie cushion with you, It works for me.

[Just PAchinkos]

Arby you made me smile! Thanks!!!!

[arbycoffee]

It be the Whooie cushion, It breaks down everybody to tears, because we have all been there, ell, I use it in elevators, bathrooms, any small room or really any open space to with more than five people.

I even put one under the sheets on my wedding night, That was a banger, it went off at the right/wrong time. I laughted so hard I went south.

[Just PAchinkos]

You've just reminded me about something my Dad did this summer.....
He and his wife were trying to kills some time between apointments and spotted a 'Garden Party' sign so they thought they'd drop in and have a look. When they got in they realised it was an annual party and was for the Lorded posh folk in their hats and suits, so Dad and his wife in 'normal' scruffs are there trying to keep obscure, they had their dog with them, and his wife went for a hotdog from the BBQ. Unfortunately on the way back she dropped it and the dog swollowed it whole. I'm not sure if it is normal for dogs but if their dog eats anything hot he immediately throws up. Aparently he managed to projectile vomit everywhere, right in the middle of the lawn. My step mom was so embarressed she wanted to tidy it up before anybody noticed,my dad said in a loud voice while she was collecting it in a hanky,"Darling surely your not that hungry!" All eyes on her.

[Sid]

Ouch thems fighting words..

[Tulsa]

[SteveFoxUK]

Aw poor old Nik, theres flu and theres Man Flu isnt there?!?!

I bet you 2 "New Pence" that the old bag has made enquiries already and Claims Direct are on the case as I type! Like you, I try really really hard to be polite to people but sometimes thats simply not good enough - theyre looking for a fight and nothing is going to put them off.

In cases like these theres two courses open to you...

1) Say "Im sorry, Im only covered for Public Liability, not Public Stupidity - how much common sense are you missing?"

or

2) Simply say "Oh, I think Ive got something of yours in MY pocket...", rummage around and then pull out a raised finger.

Can you tell I work in a pub and have to deal with difficult people sometimes?

Cheers,

Foxy

[Just PAchinkos]

I like it Foxy , did you graduate from the University of Publicans Customer Service?

[Just PAchinkos]

And by the way, this is the worst case of Man Flu ever recorded in the civilized world.....only known cure, hot milk honey whisky and paracetamol and any other medicine I can find.
I invited friends round to see in the New Year and slept through most of the evening.
(I logged on to pachitalk for the first time and had 550 unread messages thats how ill I have been, not even got on pachitalk!)

Any way a bit late but Happy New Year to you all!