Save the Airlines :>

[luckydog]

HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES


Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place

Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants would not need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.'

Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?

Sincerely,
Bill Clinton

[Youngjedi]

HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES



Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women.

[Tulsa]

If they fear seeing naked women and they martyr themselves to get 70 virgins in muslim afterlife, what is it they plan to do with the virgins?

[musky]

Hope that the 70 virgins are not Nuns with shotguns

[birdbrain]

After his death, Osama bin Laden went to heaven. There he was greeted by George Washington, who proceeded to slap him across his face and yell at him, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"

Patrick Henry appoached and punched Osama in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed." James Madison entered, kicked Osama in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"

Thomas Jefferson came in and proceeded to beat Osama many times with a long cane and said, "it was evil men like you that provided me the inspiration to pen the Declaration of Independence!" These beatings and thrashings continued as John Rudolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the Muslim terrorist leader.

As Osama lay bleeding and writhing in unbearable pain, an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept and said to the Angel, "This is not what you promised me!"

The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in heaven. What did you think I said?"

[Sid]

Did you guys hear the one about the Immaculate conception?

[johntofva]

The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in heaven. What did you think I said?"

Oh come on!!!You have to love this!!!

[jc1444]

Hell all of these sound good to me!