Bumper Stickers
"If you can't feed em, don't breed em!"
constipated people don't give a crap.
If you can read this, i've lost my trailer.
Horn broken... Watch for finger.
The earth is full - go home.
I have the body of a god - buddha.
So many pedestrians - so little time.
Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
Illiterate? Write for help.
Honk if anything falls off.
Cover me, i'm changing lanes.
He who hesitates not only is lost, but is miles from the next exit.
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
You! Out of the gene pool - now!
Fight crime: shoot back!
(seen upside down on a jeep) if you can read this, please flip me back over.
Guys: no shirt, no service gals: no shirt, no charge
if walking is so good for you, then why does my mailman look like jabba the hut?
Ax me about ebonics.
Body by nautilus; brain by mattel
boldly going nowhere.
Caution - driver legally blonde.
Heart attacks: god's revenge for eating his animal friends
honk if you've never seen an uzi fired from a car window.
How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?
Grow your own dope -- plant a man.
And lastly:
"politicians & diapers both need to be changed, and for the same reason"
"I've stopped fighting my inner demons, we are on the same side now." 
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